Category Archives: Kids/Baby Jokes

OUTHOUSE

Once a tourist went to the mountains , there he saw a very little cabin .curious he knocked on the door

“Anybody home?”

A child’s voice answered, “Yep.”

“Is your Father there?”

“Pa? Nope, he left before Ma came in.”

“Well, is your Mother there?”

“Nope, Ma left just before I got here.”

“Are you never together as a family?”

“Sure, but not here. This is the outhouse!”

P-MAIL

Joe was a successful computer programmer and a happy family man. His life was blessed with a loving wife, 2 kids, three cats and a dog. Joe loved taking Rusty the dog for his evening walk and was proud when his son, little Johnny, began asking to go along on Rusty’s evening walks.

Little Johnny was an observant and curious child and one evening asked his father: ‘Daddy, why does Rusty always sniff that phone pole when we take him for his walk?’

Well, Joe wasn’t sure how he should answer his son. How DOES one explain the way animals mark their territory to a 6-year-old?

Stalling for time Joe asked, “What do you think he’s doing Johnny?”

Johnny frowned in concentration, then brightened and said, “I know! I Know! He’s checking his P-Mail!”

JHONNY

His pediatrician asked six-year-old Johnny, who watched a good many TV, adds, just to make conversation. Johnny, if you found a couple of dollars and had to spend them, what would you buy?”
“A box of Tampax,” he replied without hesitation.
“Tampax?” said the doctor. “What would you do with that?”
“Well,” said Johnny, “I do not know exactly, but it’s sure worth two dollars.
With tampax, it says on TV, you can go swimming, go horseback riding, and also go skating, any time you want to.”

Read more: http://www.ajokeaday.com/Clasificacion.asp?ID=22#ixzz2XVt9hmBd

INNOCENCE IS BLISS

A little four year old boy is sitting on the toilet. His mother thinks he has been in there too long, so she goes in to see what’s up.

The little boy is sitting on the toilet reading a comic book. But about every 10 seconds or so he puts the book down, grips onto the toilet seat with his left hand and hits himself on top of the head with his right hand.

His mother says, “Billy, are you all right? You’ve been in here for a while.”

Billy says, “I’m fine, mummy… I just haven’t done it yet.”

Mother says, “OK, you can stay here a few more minutes. But, Billy, why are you hitting yourself on the head?”

Billy says, “It works on the ketchup bottle!”

EMPTY HEAD

A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of blood.

Trying to make the matter clearer, he said, “Now class, if I stood on my head, the blood as you know, would run into it and I should turn red in the face.”

“Yes, sir,” the class said.

“Then why is it that while I am standing upright in an ordinary position the blood doesn’t run into my feet?”

Pappu shouted, “Cause your feet ain’t empty.”

GENEALOGY

A little girl asked her mother, “How did the human race appear?”

The mother answered, “God made Adam took one of his ribs and made Eve. They lived in the Garden of Eden till a snake gave Eve an apple which she and Adam took a bite from and they were thrown out into the world naked and alone. They had children and so was all mankind made.”

Two days later the girl asked her father the same question. The father answered, “Many years ago there were monkeys from which the human race evolved.”

The confused girl returned to her mother and said, “Mom, how is it possible that you told me the human race was created by God, and Dad said they evolved from monkeys?”

The mother answered, “Well, dear, it is very simple. I told you about my side of the family and your father told you about his.”