Category Archives: Funny Letters - Page 3

Amicable old lady

“Dear Reyer School, God bless you for the beautiful radio I won at your
recent senior citizen’s luncheon. I am 84 years old and live at the county
home for the aged. All my people are gone. It’s nice to know that someone
thinks of me. God bless you for your kindness to an old forgotten lady.
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NOTIFICATION TO ALL STAFF REGARDING LANGUAGE

It has been brought to our attention that some individuals have been
using foul language during the execution of their duties. Due to
complaints from managers who are more easily offended, this type of
language will no longer be tolerated.

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THE IRS LETTER…

Dear Sirs:
I am responding to your letter denying the deduction for two of the
three dependents I claimed on my 1996 Federal Tax return. Thank you. I
have questioned whether these are my children or not for years. They
are evil and expensive.
It’s only fair, since they are minors and not my responsbility, that
the government (who evidently is taxing me more to care for these waifs)
knows something about them and what to expect over the next year. You
may apply next year to reassign them to me and reinstate the
deduction.
This year they are yours!

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A new tax

Department of the Treasury
Internal Revenue Service
Washington, D.C.
To: All Male Taxpayers
RE: Notice of increase of tax payment
Form 1040 – P
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Save the Yeasts

EVERY TIME A LOAF OF BREAD
IS BAKED,
APPROXIMATELY
150,000,000 YEASTS ARE
KILLED.

Come to the award-winning 1987 film,
“The Very Small and Quiet Screams”
— a cinematic electromicrograph of yeasts being baked.

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Condom Modelling Rejection

TROJAN CONDOM COMPANY

6969 Slippery Root Drive
Droptrouser, NC 22269

Dear John Doe,

We regret to inform you that we have rejected your application to model
and represent our product, TROJAN CONDOMS.

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