Category Archives: Education Jokes

LETTER FOR DAD

One morning a FATHER found a letter from his son . Fearing the worse with trembling hand he opened the letter.IT said

DEAR DAD

It is with great regret and sorrow that I’m writing you. I had to elope with my new girlfriend because I wanted to avoid scene with Mom and you. I have been finding real passion with Stacy and she is so nice.

But I knew you would not approve of her because of all her piercing, tattoos, tight motorcycle clothes and the fact that she is much older than I am. But it’s not only the passion. Dad she’s pregnant.

Stacy said that we will be very happy. She owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter. We share a dream of having many more children.

Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn’t really hurt anyone. We’ll be growing it for ourselves and trading it with the other people that live nearby for cocaine and ecstasy.

In the meantime we will pray that science will find a cure for AIDS so Stacy can get better. She deserves it.

Don’t worry Dad. I’m 16 and I know how to take care of myself.

Someday I’m sure that we will be back to visit so that you can get to know your grandchildren.

Love,
Your Son JOHNNY
P.S.
DAD I am at Andy’s and none of it is true . The REPORT CARD is in the drawer ‘just wanted u to remind tat there are worse things in life.
LOVE you and let me know when it is safe to come back home.

EMPTY HEAD

A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of blood.

Trying to make the matter clearer, he said, “Now class, if I stood on my head, the blood as you know, would run into it and I should turn red in the face.”

“Yes, sir,” the class said.

“Then why is it that while I am standing upright in an ordinary position the blood doesn’t run into my feet?”

Pappu shouted, “Cause your feet ain’t empty.”

GENEALOGY

A little girl asked her mother, “How did the human race appear?”

The mother answered, “God made Adam took one of his ribs and made Eve. They lived in the Garden of Eden till a snake gave Eve an apple which she and Adam took a bite from and they were thrown out into the world naked and alone. They had children and so was all mankind made.”

Two days later the girl asked her father the same question. The father answered, “Many years ago there were monkeys from which the human race evolved.”

The confused girl returned to her mother and said, “Mom, how is it possible that you told me the human race was created by God, and Dad said they evolved from monkeys?”

The mother answered, “Well, dear, it is very simple. I told you about my side of the family and your father told you about his.”

MISTAKEN IDENTITY

A gentleman was much surprised when the good-looking young lady greeted him by saying, “Good evening.”

He could not remember ever having seen her before.

She evidently realized that she had made a mistake, for she apologized and explained: “Oh, I ‘m so sorry. When I first saw you I thought you were the father of two of my children.”

She walked on while the man stared after her. She did not realize, of course, that he was unaware of the fact that she was a school teacher.

UNBEATABLE LOGIC

Santa decided to study for the MBA exam. He could understand every thing except for the LOGIC part. One day when he was reading, one of his friends came home.

Friend: Santa, how is your MBA preparation?

Santa: Every thing is fine, but I could not understand Logic.

Friend: Logic is very easy.

Santa: Can you give me an example, so that I can understand?

Friend: OK. Do you have fish pot in your house?

Santa: YES.

Friend: Logically, there will be water in it.

Santa: YES.

Friend: Logically, there will be fish in it.

Santa: YES.

Friend: Logically, someone will be feeding the fish.

Santa: YES.

Friend: I take a guess that your wife will be feeding the fish.

Santa: YES.

Friend: so, logically, your are married.

Santa: YES.

Friend: So, that means you are a heterosexual.

Santa was very glad and he understood logic. Next day he sees Banta who was also preparing for MBA.

Santa: How is your MBA preparation?

Banta: Everything is fine except for the logic.

Santa: Oh, logic is easy.

Banta: Please, give me an example.

Santa: Do you have a fish pot in your house?

Banta: NO, I don’t.

Santa: Oh my God! That means you’re gay!

TOO MANY MISTAKES

Johnny’s English teacher was a perfectionist and demanded the very best of his pupils. So, it was only to be expected that he would get furious when Little Johnny handed in a poor paper.

“This is the worst essay I have ever had the misfortune of reading,” ranted the teacher.

“It has too many mistakes. I can’t understand how one person would have made all these mistakes!”

“One person didn’t,” replied Little Johnny defensively. “My father helped me!”