Doctor: “It`s no good. I can`t find anything wrong with you. It must just be the effects of drinking.”
Patient: “I`ll come back when you`re sober then!”

Two old men were arguing the merits of their doctors.
The first one said, “I don`t trust your fancy doctor. He treated old Jake for a kidney ailment for nearly a year, and then Jake died of a liver ailment.”
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When the tribal chief was suffering from constipation, one of his men goes to a doctor.
Knowing little English he says, `Big Chief!…… No shit!!`
The doctor prescribes the medicines for 3 days, which the man gives to his chief. The chief hoping for a faster cure takes all the medicines in one gulp.
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Patient: “Doctor, you must help me. I`m under such a lot of stress that I keep losing my temper with people.”
Doctor: “Tell me about your problem”.

Patient: “I JUST DID, DIDN`T I….YOU STUPID MORON!!!”

A doctor at an (insane) asylum decided to take his inmates to a baseball game. For weeks in advance, he coached his patients to respond to his commands. When the day of the game arrived, everything seemed to be going well. As the national anthem started, the doctor yelled, “Up nuts!“
And the inmates complied by standing up. After the anthem he yelled, “Down nuts!“ And they all sat.
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