Category Archives: Bar/Drunk Jokes - Page 8

Hangover !!!

It was the morning after, and he sat groaning and holding his head.
“Well, if you hadn`t drunk so much last night you wouldn`t feel so bad now,” the wife said tartly.
“My drinking had nothing to do with it,” he answered. “I went to bed feeling wonderful and woke up feeling awful. It was the sleep that did it!”

How long?

This drunk gets on a bus and asks the driver how long the trip is between Limerick and Cork.
About two hours,” says the conductor.
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Don`t you have a bigger chicken?

A meat counter clerk, who was drunk and had a particularly good day, proudly flipped his last chicken on a scale and weighed it.
“That will be $6.35,” he told the customer.
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Military precision!

Some ladies, who were determined to put an end to drinking in their colony, went to the house of a retired Army Officer one evening.
“When did you last have a drink?” they asked
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Half drunk!

A man saw his friend limping badly as he came towards him. “Yaar, how did you get this injury to your leg?”
“I did not have enough to drink,” replied the other.
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Fair is fair

Two men started in a bar and then had a couple of drinks together.
“Look”, said one,”I want to treat you now, but I`ve no more money with me. I`ll just go back to my flat and gets some from my wife. Why don`t you amoe along.
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